the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
