i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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