It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
