Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
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Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
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Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize