If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
