I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere