Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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