He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
