just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
