i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize