oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
