girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Shame is for Republicans.
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