i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize