Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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