The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Just cropdusted the office
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic