my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
