i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
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When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
be right there i have to get my cape
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
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I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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