yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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