ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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