Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
