so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
