Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
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