I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
