Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
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