I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize