chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize