what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
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