Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
