My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
