It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
