If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize