but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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