I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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