Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
