I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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