I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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