he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
