how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
