so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize