after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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