It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
two words: eviction party
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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