I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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