I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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