You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
