What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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