lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
