she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
