haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
