So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
