She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
