Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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